Let’s be honest: the worst movies are usually actually pretty good — they’re so bad that they’re hilarious! And if they hail from the greatest decade ever, well, they’re just about guaranteed to bring you a heaping, steaming pile of … uh … joy. So let’s dig in to the worst 80s movies and see what sort of trouble we can uncover.
The worst 80s movies include:
Released late in 1987. It’s about a mannequin that comes to life and falls in love with an artist who sculpts it.
The worst thing is the movie actually has potential — there are some funny moments and decent acting performance by Kim Cattrall as the protagonist Barbara Maitland/mannequin “Lucy.” It’s just that the movie is directed and written poorly enough, it falls flat on its face.
A lot of people love this movie, but they’re just wrong.
Basically, this one is about the worst mother in history.
It was released in 1981 and starred Faye Dunaway as a crazy woman who is also an abusive parent to her daughter Christina Crawford, played by Diana Scarwid and Mara Hobel.
If this film has one redeeming quality, it’s that it taught us all a lesson: “No wire hangers EVER!”.
Two of a Kind
Released in 1983, Two of a Kind reunites John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John in a sequel to the smash Grease, about two lost souls from different worlds who find each other and fall in love — all while trying to save Earth from the next round of *gulp* God’s wrath.
Fun and ridiculousness ensue.
Released in 1985, Heavenly Bodies is a drama about the struggle of a small dance studio to survive, along with all the subtexts you might imagine. Starring Cynthia Dale, Walter George Alton, and Stuart Stone, it’s clear this movie tried to capitalize on the popularity of Flashdance, but it didn’t succeed.
Released in 1981, Inchon is a war film about the Battle of Inchon during the Korean War. It stars Laurence Olivier and Ben Gazzara with an all-star cast including John Wayne, Toshiro Mifune, Jackie Cooper among others. It has a terrible rating on sites like Rotten Tomatoes and an even worst reputation among those who have seen it.
All five of us.
In 1983, Yentl was directed by and starred Barbara Streisand. It’s a movie about the life of Jewish girl in Eastern Europe who disguises herself as an older boy to be able to pursue her education. This film is ranked slightly better than worst movies often are — in some circles, at least — and the overall story is uplifting.
But, sheesh, this one is tough to watch, and it seems to go on forever.
Released in 1987, this film starring Dustin Hoffman and Warren Beatty has become notorious for its production problems. The budget of the movie was over $55 million, about five times what it took to make Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope (1977). As a bonus for all the money lost, Ishtar also ranks as one of the worst films ever.
Howard the Duck
Howard the Duck is one of the most amazing, most entertaining films ever produced.
But … um … it has a lot of problems.
Released in 1986, this George Lucas-produced film was marketed as an “adult” comedy and struggled at the box office with about $38 million grossed on a budget of around $37 million.
Oh, God! Book II
Starring George Burns and released in 1980, this movie is actually the sequel to 1977’s Oh, God!. The plot of this one: God (Burns) hires an 11-year-old girl to help him market himself.
You know, because the deity business is so cutthroat. Or something.
While the original move was sort of charming, if ridiculous, Book II is just … ridiculous all around.
(Like Worst 80s Movies? Then you might like our article on Worst Movies of the 70s, click here.)
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